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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not sure. This begs for more context. It depends. Could you have mentioned it to him earlier? Sounds like dh wants to have a clear sense of how you'll spend your time at the in-laws.[/quote]

[b]This.[/b]

In isolation, no, getting angry about you not telling him before dinner is kind of ridiculous.  It's reasonable to make a suggestion like that casually the next time you see him after talking to your sister.

However, if this is in the context of a history of being flaky - either you or your family (or you as an extension of your family) - and by flaky, I mean an unwillingness to make and commit to specific plans - then sure, this is probably setting him off - justifiably so - because it's part of a larger pattern.

Some people use flakiness and constantly changing plans as a form of controlling behavior: your husband can't reasonably punt on the trip, say he's not going or refuse to otherwise go along with the flaky behavior, unless he's willing to be "the bad guy" or the "unreasonable person".  But he can't plan the rest of his time or life or set expections or anything else, because he has to be ready to change plans and jump or do whatever when the person who is in charge of deciding when

I had a girlfriend like this - she herself wasn't bad, but her mother was a nutcase (there was a clinical diagnosis) and would threaten tantrums, etc. any time anyone said "no" in any way shape or form.  I couldn't care less - I'd have been happy to tell her to stick it.  But my GF wasn't willing to stand up to her, so we were constantly jerked around - come earlier, come later - couldn't plan a thing.  The entire household was dominated by this flaky behavior.

No idea if any of this applies to you or your situation.  You asked if it was reasonable...nope, not in isolation (and his behavior could be signs of something ominous too), but this is a [i]possible[/i] reason he might reasonably be upset.  [/quote]

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