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[quote=Anonymous]If your wife with all of her responsibilities with young children is visiting her grandmother once a week, it is obvious that this person if VERY important to her. She wants to maintain whatever connection she can, probably also because she has young kids.

By visiting so infrequently the perceived message could be that you not only do not care that much about her grandmother (you may not be close to her which is ok) BUT much worse is that you might not care about how much SHE cares.

Just as important as the offer to visit more, and in fact, MORE important is to talk to your wife about her feelings about her grandmother. What are her memories of her, what does she want her kids to know about their great grandmother? Etc. Show you care about her inner feelings and motivations for maintaining this connection. That will do more than visiting more. But then you should visit more as well.

Also, share your feelings about why you dont visit. Maybe you dont feel a connection? Maybe it creeps you out to go to a nursing home? Etc. SHARE in this experience and it will help a lot. Its probably just what your wife needs.[/quote]

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