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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As a low-drive spouse, I can say fairly confidently that his lack of sex drive has *nothing* to do with you.

That's not to say it shouldn't bother you, but it shouldn't bother you for that particular reason.

[b]I think you sound insecure and immature, needing outside approval and praise so much[/b] that you'd break up your family in search of it.

(Again, I'm not saying sex isn't important in a marriage.  But in this case, you yourself said that's not really what you care about.)[/quote]

I agree with this. Your need for sex is tied up in your self esteem and that is a red flag to me.  Do you enjoy sex because you are horny and need to get off or do you use it as some sort of self validating tool?[/quote]

I tend to agree. The red flag for me is that he had a low sex drive all along, and you were okay with this. I think it is common (and I have definitely done this myself, we all do, so not putting you down), to blame our spouse for things in us we wish we could change. It is awfully convenient now that you are older and settled to suddenly want validation through sex etc.

You guys could benefit from counseling because your husband should step it up, but you do sound like you need to do some soul searching.[/quote]

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