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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

To try to clarify my question:

How common are two full time, WAHM, working professional parents without family nearby and both commute 30+ min to work? And where are such households?  My theory is one parent will downshift or work close to home. Or I guess they hire a nanny/driver?[/quote]

I really think this is fairly common, and yes it is extremely challenging, and no it doesn't work well.   I think your problem would get much worse though if you moved further out thereby lengthening your commutes.

This describes us until a few months ago.  Then we added a 3rd child and i downshifted at work.  I took a position where I could telecommute multiple times a week.  This makes a substantial difference.   If you are both feds, why can't you telecommute?  I would seriously consider switching to a position where you can telecommute.   I also set my hours so that the days I am in the office are shorter days, and I work longer days at home.   Not having to commute a few days a week means that I can spend my lunch hour going to the grocery store.  I can usually fold laundry on work phone calls.  I can arrange for deliveries, what have you, for my teleworking days.

Before I made this change- I was very worked up at the thought of stepping out of my career path.  Now that I have done it-- it just doesn't matter to me.  Our lives are so much more peaceful (even with the additional child!)[/quote]

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