Reply to What do you think of my unique sex life?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here is why I think it is unique:

We've been married, mostly happily, for about 12 years. Like all marriages our sex life (from my perspective) has been amazing at times, and very weak at other times. I'm a normal guy.[b] But my wife simply doesn't enjoy sex. Many times, she even finds it uncomfortable, if not painful. I attribute this to poor sex education as a child. She was raised to believe that it is taboo.[/b] On top of that, I know there are some physical issues too that I can't really describe in detail.
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Have you tried making it enjoyable for her?  It sounds like you are fine with her discomfort, which you shouldn't be.[/quote]

Oh come on, PP. Read his whole post. He likes that she is willing to let him do whatever he wants to her, as often as he wants, in exactly the manner he wants. He thinks it's a plus that it's all on his terms. This post isn't a cry for help. It's a brag.[/quote]

This is not a brag. I would much prefer a willing participant. As I said before, she doesn't enjoy it.  To be considerate I finish fast and we use a position that she is happy with. Her terms would be to hug only and no sex which is not acceptable to me. Thus we are compromising. It is working but it is not ideal. [/quote]

But you say that her letting you control everything is good news.

Assuming that you are not a jerk, here are some questions:

How often do you have sex? How often do you want to have sex?  Does your wife have body image issues? Does she have issues with repression in other areas of life? What else do you do together that you find fulfilling? Would she be upset if you masturbated instead of having sex? Are you comfortable talking to her about these issues?

One of the reasons people suggest counseling is that a counselor will facilitate the two of you talking to each other about these issues. She's your wife and she loves you. If the arrangement is a problem for you and you have a solution other than "want it more, wife!", you could just skip the therapist and talk to her about it. Or you could continue to brag about how great it is that your wife lets you do whatever you want and never says no. Your call.[/quote]

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