Reply to Goodness - advice or something like that, please

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[quote=StormyHeather][quote=Anonymous]You're upset and hurt and angry. That's totally normal. This does not mean the relationship is over. It sounds like at some point the two of you withdrew from one another rather than towards one another. For you, it was not moving; for him it was sleeping with someone. What's important is to figure out how things will be different (assuming you stay together.) How will you ccommunicate with each other when things aren't going well? What will you each do differently?

It wouldn't hurt to see a counselor together to work through this. Someone objective can help you both navigate through a lot of feelings. It may be messy for a while, but that doesn't mean this cannot be salvaged.[/quote]

I agree with this.  The fact that he did this during a time when you two weren't physically together, and it sounds like it was actually before you'd both really committed to the relationship makes it sound like he's not going to do it again, unless you move out or something.  And the fact that he felt so guilty about it that he confessed also says to me that he loves you and he's not going to do it again (why would he put himself through the guilt?).

To be honest, If I were in your situation I'd be more concerned with why you've been together for 5 years and you're not married, but that's just me.  Maybe you don't want to get married.[/quote]

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