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[quote=Anonymous]For the past 16 years, I've tried to help my mom and my brother.  I realized about 10 years ago that I had to stop giving them money or else they would just keep getting deeper and deeper.  My mom got a Master's degree but failed to heed my advice and get experience, so now no one will hire her.  But, she doesn't even want to work in her field, because she doesn't want to deal with the "politics".  Then, I read this article about why poor people make bad decisions:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/linda-tirado/why-poor-peoples-bad-decisions-make-perfect-sense_b_4326233.html

And, I think my mom just has a poor mentality. I grew up middle class.  When my parents split, my dad continued to live middle class while my mom has been poor ever since.  I thought going to school was getting her back on her feet.  But, I see now that isn't capable of dealing with money.  She lives paycheck to paycheck, robbing "Peter" to pay "Paul", and when she does have extra money, she spends it on things she thinks she owes people.  She started having a little more money and then committed herself to paying for $3,000 a cruise for my grandmother.  She would have finally been in the green if she didn't agree to pay for a cruise that totaled all of her food and other budget every month.  She got an advance on her check for the holidays and she wants to spend $50 on both grand kids, one of them my daughter.  I told her that she should go to the thrift store and pick out the cutest outfits, because that's something along the lines of what I'm going to do, even though we have the money to do more.  She feels like she owes my daughter something.   She feels like she owes me something. She doesn't have this money.  She feels like she owes everyone something.  She was supposed to move with several thousand dollars saved, but spent everything on goodbye gifts for friends, because she felt like the owed them all something.

I remember the years she spent getting into those payday loans.  And, she's still doing it with these check advances.  She's borrowing from the future to pay for yesterday.  So, she's always going to be poor.

Is there anything I can do to help her loose this poor mentality?  She doesn't have to be poor.  She has so many opportunities to live a not-poor life.

Oh, and my brother is the same way.  Not my dad.  [/quote]

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