Reply to Enjoy the present. If things go the way you fear, we'll deal with it then. (A vent)

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Reply to "Enjoy the present. If things go the way you fear, we'll deal with it then. (A vent)"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I disagree.  When an AA goes into recovery, it's a process.  1st is denial and then is anger/depression.  It's very common during the early stages of sobriety for the AA to be angry and lashing out at those around him.

If he continues for a long time with his anger - then it's the "dry drunk" thing, but I would give him some time.  Instead of arguing, perhaps you could offer words of encouragement.  "I know it sucks, honey, and I know it's hard, but let's stick to this for a year and see where we are at that point."  try that. [/quote]

It doesn't sound to me like this is a person who is into recovery. It sounds like this is a person whose spouse asked him to do something he didn't want to do and did not understand the rationale for. It sounds like the agreement in question involved seeing a therapist, which her husband has actively not done.

I agree that she should give it some time - a month is not that long - but there is, in my opinion, a limit to how much/how long a person can be lashed out at by their partner before it starts to degrade the relationship. In my own relationship (which involved a lot of the same elements), I tried to nip the degradation in the bud before it started to flower. So far, it's working okay, but the anger and drama still flares up from time to time. Not as often as it used to, and not in a way that fundamentally changes how I feel about him, but it's not gone. We've been dealing with this cycle for about 10 months.[/quote]

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