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[quote=Anonymous] For five years, dh, the kids, and I left the area and celebrated Thanksgiving on our own, and we all loved having a relaxing day with just ourselves. We made our own holiday traditions, and were very happy. We like to watch football, talk, and just hang out and enjoy one another's company.

We moved back to the area a few years ago, and have found our extended family overwhelming. Nobody but us wants to watch football, and really, it's just chaotic with everone in the house. I can't remember the last time I sat down in a chair before the meal was on the table.

Really, Thanksgiving has been nothing but torturous for us the past several years. I end up doing the cooking for everyone because everyone else tries to get creative, and they're NOT good at it. Examples include mashed potatoes with hummus, chestnuts and oregano incorporated into the standard green bean casserole, and squash substituted for pumpkin in the pies. Believe me, there's more... But the food should really be secondary to the family anyway - I get that. It's just all so hard.

Also, extended family includes mom/stepdad (neither of whom cooks/cleans up), sister and BIL and their 5 kids, my cousin, his wife, and their 30-something dd  (who still lives at home with them and has never held a job) and her 3 kids. I love these people, but in addition to doing most of the cooking, I do 80% of the cleanup.

God, I sound like a bitch. I might be somewhat...

That said, I just want to have a nice Thanksgiving that doesn't stress me out. Dh and the kids have been pushing for this as well. I do not want to hurt the extended family's feelings, though. So rock - me - hard place.

Any advice? How can I balance what makes my family happy with insulting the rest of the family? How can I make this about what I need instead of having it be a rejection of the family? Is that impossible?[/quote]

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