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[quote=Anonymous]i think just having a baby is one of those hall passes to be totally selfish with what works best for you and your family. not what is best for your parents or inlaws or anyone else.

i think you should insist on the hotel and rental car for both your parents and inlaws. and be clear with them that you won't be able to cook and clean when they visit. i think its ridiculous that they would expect to be catered to immediately after having a baby!

for me, i told them no visitors for the first two weeks and no one was staying with us (we didn't have any space to host anyone anyways). my mom wasn't thrilled with the idea and she kept asking to come sooner but i stood my ground. i wanted that time with my baby and my husband. we don't have family in the area and everyone insisted that we would need the help but we really just cuddled up in the house for two weeks. my husband was off for a bit and then worked from home. sure it would have been nice for someone to run to the grocery store or pick up take out but it wasn't anything we couldn't handle. everyone thought i was crazy for not wanting help but i'm just more independent and knew that was what would work best for me. it doesn't sound like your parents are going to be much help to you so its not like you are missing out on having the extra hands for cooking and cleaning that a lot of grandparents provide.
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