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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Is there a way to not let a marriage in crisis ruin your every waking moment? Need actual tips"
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[quote=Anonymous]During the last year of my marriage, I meditated almost nightly (only way I could empty my brain enough to sleep). There are lots of guided meditations available on=line to help, and several centers around town that have weekly meetings or classes. I also bought an iPod and spent a lot of time listening to fun and upbeat music - yes, Katy Perry, Kelly Clarkson, etc. I think music can really help with mood. And I exercised a lot! I would run like a demon, and pump weights like crazy. Endorphins are your friend, as is sunlight. Can you take DD out for local hikes or bike rides each weekend day? I also wrote. I took notes of what was happening, organized thoughts about what had happened in the marriage, read up on good marriages and set out what mine lacked - not to cast blame or be negative, but to understand what a marriage should be and how mine didn't meet the standards any ordinary person would have. This made me feel less "crazy" and more sane about what was and was not my fault, because addicts like to deny their reality and their role in it, and it can be very crazymaking to be in relationships with them. And I did some written exercises, such as imagining life divorced, and writing down my anger and disappointment and then visualizing putting it all in a box and putting that box away so I'd be free to live without it. [/quote]
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