Reply to Do I tell my brother a family secret about him that everyone but him knows??

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[quote=Anonymous]If the whole family knows, except for him, I doubt that this is  not true. 
He should know the truth. The way to bring this up, however, is not over a phone call or an email. It seems like you live far from where he lives, so perhaps waiting for a face to face meeting would be appropriate. I don't think you can just convince him to get counseling, but maybe you should get a counselor to help you through this emotional time and both with how to tell him and how to deal with the after effect of telling him, which will be the hardest part, for sure. 
If he is so hurt already and holding so much anger, could you get his wife involved? If you have a good relationship with her, maybe it would be a good idea to tell her and get her involved in the process of telling him, specially since she will be his biggest emotional support in the afterwards process.
A few things that may help him is telling him is making sure you emphasize how your father has no excuse in the world for his behavior and the way that he raised and treated both of you. But while none of that has an excuse, the disparity in the way he treated both of you and his pushing your mom away may have this fact as an explanation. 
He may want to go after his real father for closure and you can help him with the search, witch may provide him with some peace and closure. He deserves that much. Make sure that you tell him how proud you are of him for beating all the odds and becoming such an awesome dad today, which was probably really hard for him, not having the example to follow. 
You are a good sister for being so concerned about his well being and I really hope this all ends on a positive note. 
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