Reply to DH constantly putting me down, especially my appearance

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Reply to "DH constantly putting me down, especially my appearance"

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[quote=Anonymous]This is totally unacceptable behavior, OP. He is abusing you. You deserve to be with someone who cherishes and celebrates every bit of you, from head to toe. And your daughter deserves (and needs) parents/a mother who model a healthy, loving relationship. This is neither healthy nor loving, and I can guarantee it is negatively effecting your daughter. You sound very conscientious of your daughter. I assume you would never say something like "I'm so fat" or "I'm ugly" in front of her. Don't let your husband do it.

Had you not mentioned therapy, my advice would have been to issue him an ultimatum (stop cold turkey with the insults or I'm leaving you) and then some SERIOUS therapy. But since you guys have been down that route, and this is a very easy issue for your husband to control, I would not say this is a salvageable relationship. He is actively choosing to continue this behavior. I agree that this his insults are rooted in his own issues, but this is not an issue of addiction or mental illness. This is an issue of him not consciously choosing to be a supportive and loving husband, and actively working to resolve whatever issues he has.

I realize I've really gone on a rant here but I'm just so sad to think about a fellow DCUMer being treated like this. You really deserve better, OP, and you shouldn't be making excuses for your husband's behavior to anyone. He should be begging forgiveness. I wish you and your daughter all the best, and I really hope that you start taking steps to leave him because it will lead to a healthier, more loving environment for you and DD. Good luck![/quote]

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