Reply to DH told me he is depressed; what do I do now?

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[quote=Anonymous]OP I wish my depressed husband had taken this step on his own. Its been terrible and I completely understand your fear for your future and your children.

I dont know how to "bump" a post, but I'll find the link to the post I put up yesterday about male depression and some of its different symptoms and the kind of arc of it. It really amazed me  how much it matched what I have been observing.

Believe your husband when he says he does not want a divorce. Please for now chalk up what he is said to the "depression talking". I cant tell you how many times I have heard from my husband that he cant make me happy. Etc etc etc. His became the angry depression, but I saw only the anger and did not see the depression for a # of reasons.

Take heart that 1) he understands he is depressed and 2) he feels he needs to repair himself on his own. OMG! My husband has just NOW come to this conclusion, but of course he is too depressed and disorganzied to not need my help. At least he is thinking more straight.

Try not to panic. Easier said than done. Read up on things you can do to assist a person with depression. Encourage him to do all the healthy things outside of the therapy and meds by sharing those with him- exercise, outings, fun things, even if he appears to not be having "fun". Its important for him to be intergrated into the family because he will tend to isolate, as my husband has /did. And then it becomes easier to let them do that, as I did, and then it messes with the kids heads, as it has begun to here.

Breathe- remain focused on the fact that knowledge is power and your husband has the most important pieces already- really. This is actually a best case scenario for such a terrible scenario.

Good Luck![/quote]

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