Reply to Please tell me a happy after divorce story....

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Please tell me a happy after divorce story...."

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My husband divorced his ex-wife after a long period of "sticking it out" for his son. The last 7 years of their marriage were, he says, miserable, but he felt like he couldn't leave because of what divorce would do to his kid. Finally, things got bad enough that he figured divorce was better than continuing to stay in the marriage. They didn't even do anything as a family anymore; they'd go to the son's sports and school stuff but take separate cars, and one would eat dinner with the son, while the other did whatever. Didn't sleep in the same room, rarely spoke. He says it was just awful.

So, finally, after making it as long as he could, he asked for a divorce. He and I have a very happy marriage- we had one child together and are expecting our second child next month. My DH was approached by a guy he works with last winter who asked his opinion about divorce, as he was considering leaving his wife as well. My DH came home and told me about this. His advice was "Work it out if you absolutely can, but if you can't, it's better to just get out so you can be happy." Then he said he told him it was hard to get up the nerve to ask for the divorce because it meant changing what he knew, but that he knows it was the right decision because he's never been happier.

I know he'd prefer if my stepson lived with us, because the major fly in the ointment for divorces is that it cuts your time with your kids, and that sucks. But I think my husband feels that having two happy homes vs. one miserable one where the parents don't even speak was better for his son in the long run. Plus, my stepson got siblings from the remarriage, and he's a great older brother. The ex-wife was unwilling to consider more children though my husband really wanted them. I think it makes my husband happy that his son is no longer an only child and there will be a little crew to look out for each other after we are gone.

Personally, I've never been divorced. But my parents have and both remarried and good things came from those remarriages. And my own mother in law has told me the huge difference in my DH between when he was in his previous marriage and now. It's the difference between a person existing and a person being happy. And don't underestimate what your happiness also means for your kids. Kids don't want their parents to be miserable. I was relieved when my parents divorced because they were so much better apart. I actually got to enjoy time with them instead of sitting in a stifling house where nobody was happy. [/quote]

How long have you been married?

I wish you happiness, but you should be careful what you say about other marriages. He could easily drop the divorce papers on you someday too.[/quote]

I was very careful to phrase my comments about their marriage as what he says/said about it. I have no interest in the ins and outs or placing blame or judgment. They were both unhappy, he says it was miserable. This is what my post says. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics