Reply to help remind me about being patient and understanding with husbands depression

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[quote=Anonymous]10:07 To the DH- THanks. Yes, sometimes one has to remember that its ok to feel like you cant deal. Especially when you do it 24/7 365 and just need a moment. Boy did I have one today!

Truth be told, there is noone I talk to about my husbands depression besides the therapist. This is probably because it all started with rage and nastiness which was humiliating to me, although I knew it was not my fault. Until he was ready to seek help, I had to keep it to myself. We did see some therapist before, but it feels like it was a waste on account of us not knowing about the diagnosis AND his denial.

I find that when it comes to REAL MARITAL PROBLEMS you really cannot talk to anyone. Its either an opportunity to be judged, an opportunity to hear something really stupid said, OR, at best, it just feels like a huge exposure of someone else. No matter how unfair he was to me, I did not feel it was fair to him to expose his behavior to ANYone except someone equippied to actually understand what was going on. Because really, there was no way to present it that did not make it sound ilke essentially an unfixable problem.

To the extent that depression is in any way "fixable". I wanted to speak only to someone who would know about that. It was a long wait, though, for him to come around to taking that step of treatment. And its still a struggle for him to come to terms with needing to do it at all. And I feel for him in that regard- despite what it did to me.

I know I am actually quite tough, and Ive only gotten tougher, but boy sometimes I just wonder if life for me with this man will ever be more than an opportunity to get tougher and tougher. I think it could. I have to be satistfied with that level of confidence in that.

For today, at least.[/quote]

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