Reply to If H does not significantly contribute financially what do you do

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Cut the PC crap. Few women respect men who can't bring home the bacon. You can chant in your sister circles all day about how independent you are but when it comes down to it-few women want to support a man.

But that's not fair...why are there sahms...we are all the same....blah blah blah. Your yapping doesn't change reality.

OP you can't change him. You can encourage him by showing how much you appreciate his contributions. And with patience perhaps that will lead to the discussion you really want to have. But "I want you to make more money" is not going to work.

But "thank you for working so hard. I am glad that you have always made sure to have a job. I love you" is a better starting point for both of you. Keep telling yourself that and you might see a changes from within and from him. But focus on yourself first.[/quote]

Wow, I actually wasn't being PC. Frankly, I'm an adult person who should be able to take care of myself, rather than needing someone else to take care of me. I'm not a SAHM. I make more money than my husband. We each contribute to our family in a lot of different ways. OP says that she doesn't feel that he's providing for his family and that it makes her resentful and respect him less. I do not feel that way, and I don't think it's "PC crap" to point out that no one expects this from women.[/quote]

It is PC garbage that leads to lazy ass men and bitter women. It destroys families because  when women get the beta man they said they wanted..."ooops he too boring, he doesn't make enough. Blah blah blah. Hey I like Alpha Jim.  I should get a divorce. "

Who cares what is expected of women? That is not what OP asked for advice on.  There are expectations for men and expectations for women. Sometimes they overlap and sometimes they don't. Get over it.

Things are not "the same" so let's not pretend they are. That way when the realization slaps you in the face and you are tired of your beta husband, you will know to to deal with it constructively.[/quote]

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