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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I just had an experience with my mother that really made me feel like s%%t.

She had come over to help me, to watch the kids while I do some work. The kids were behaving terribly and I was dealing with it. During this, she had a terrible look on her face and when it was all over, she said "I think I'll go now." in a really cole, emotionless voice. When I asked her why, that she had just arrived and that I thought she had come over to help me, she said she hadn't come for this and that she was "done." This brought back this horrible feeling of when I was a child and anytime I misbehaved she would just cut me off emotionally. I asked her why she was reproaching me, I hadn't done anything and she snapped "What do you want from me?" She left, saying, "I can't deal with this. Sorry, but I can't" in that same cold, angry voice.

I don't know why but it really hit me hard. It just brought back all those feelings of being shut out from her as a child and it made me angry. I walk on eggshells a lot around her to not offend her or hurt her feelings. I know she has no tolerance for any kind of misbehavior in children and judges a lot of my parenting -- she's of the no TV, no Barbie school of parenting. I raise my children a lot differently than I was raised.

When she walked out, I had this fleeting thought of "I am done with you." But OTOH, she is old and the only mom I have. Ido love her.

No real questions, just feeling kind of crappy.

[/quote]

I'm sorry you are dealing with this. VERY had. You are right in feeling you are being emotionally manipulated.  Get Dr. Laura's book "Shark Attack On Land" - it's SO emotionally freeing!   You will immediately feel at home with this book and she has some great strategies for taking control. I have heinous in-laws (not my MIL weirdly, loved her) and after reading this, felt so much better and haven't looked back. Very empowering.

Recognize her behavior is designed to make you feel bad, but in reality, it's her loss. [/quote]

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