Reply to heading into middle school, what do you wish you had known or wish you had done?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

Learn to talk to your child about everything - pimples, sex, hair, Christmas gifts for boyfriend/girlfriends, shaving, hygiene, manners, being thoughtful.  They need a lot of guidance in middle school on this and you have to figure out how to talk without embarrassing or alienating your child.  i bet i have 20 mini conversations about this sort of thing everyday.  you didnt wash your face well enough - it has oily spots, you texted that girl too many times without waiting for a response, maybe you need a second shower today, I cant smell toothpaste and I'm sure you just,brushed your teeth so maybe you need to go back over them, I didn't see a weeks worth of underwear in the laundry this week, I took a look at Edline and it looks like you're missing some homework, etc.  As an aside, it's unbelievable how much boys start to stink, especially their feet.

Pick your battles.  If it doesn't matter, let your child deal with the natural consequences.  For example, mine fight coats and long pants.  I bought them coats that roll up onto a ball the size of a grapefruit.  They have to leave the house every cold day with the coat, but once the door was closed, I didn't ask and they didn't tell.  They never did wear the coats, but they also never complained about the cold and they never got frostbite.

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How very hypocritical.  You say pick your battles/deal with the natural consequences, but you then you tell the, they didn't wash their face well enough, didn't brush their teeth well enough, homework isn't done, not enough underwear, need to wear a coat etc.  Horribly overbearing.  My son would be mortified if I told him he texted a girl too many times. OP, ignore this post.  Letting your kids figure stuff out on their own is a good tool.  Don't micromanage their lives.  Didnt wear a coat?  Okay, so you we're super cold waiting for the bus.  You learned to wear one tomorrow!  Texted a girl too many times?  She got annoyed with you and you learned that it's better not to text too much.  Didn't shower?  You smell, and noticed your horrible stench while sitting in class.  And so on and so forth.  If they want advice, they'll ask...and unless there's a serious problem, don't sweat the small stuff like this mother does.  Middle schoolers are invincible after all.[/quote]

I agree but not on the hygiene issues. Boys really do need someone to teach them good hygiene. My dh's husband did not and I almost dumped him for it. I literally had to teach him stuff like, if you smell, shower. If your breath smells, brush your teeth. Moms, please teach your sons hygiene![/quote]

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