Reply to Ack! Older grandma with messed up relationship with money!

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[quote=Anonymous]I have a very frugal mother, born into the Great Depression, who is riddled with anxiety about money. I know this is a common theme with adults of that generation, even if their particular families escaped the worst of it. But it drives me NUTS when she's with my kids! While I'm glad she doesn't overindulge them, and has certainly taught them many creative uses for things like styrofoam meat trays andvkd wine bottle corks (no kidding!), her behavior crosses into the neurotic every time we venture into any kind of restaurant or store. She tries to get over herself by taking a deep breath and, for example, offering to buy everyone ice cream cones ...at McDonald's. now no offense to McDonald's lovers out there, but its not a restaurant I normally take my children, for health reasons alone. By some miracle, it is not a place that appeals to them. But, wanting to be gracious about her offer, we thanked her and agreed to go. When we arrived, my kids all said they would prefer a fruit smoothly. Uh oh. Those are not on the dollar menu! I could see grandma wringing her hands, obviously caught between her past and present - it caused her much stress. I jumped in at this point and ordered one smoothie and three cups. We completed the transaction and drove off with my kids being mad at me as I lectured them about an attitude of gratitude. It was very uncomfortable all arou d. They did however thank their grandma, albeit unenthusiasticaly. And then there was me, driving off into the sunset (drinking my water, straw squeezing) wondering how it is that EVERY time we go out with her this kind of thing happens! I have talked with my kids about it, and they understand what people went through in those days (thank you Kit Kitterage!), but they're still just kids and get confused about the tense atmosphere. I do offer to pay always, but accept her offers sometimes because she really is trying. But it always new up so messed up!! Anyone else?. [/quote]

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