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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't really get these comments. When other loved ones engage in self-destructive behaviors, we aren't expected to stay quiet.  What if her brother was an addict, or an alcoholic, or drove recklessly, or drove in a car without a seatbelt?  Would she still have to keep her mouth shut?  Of course not - so why is this different?  [/quote]

Because merely stating the OBVIOUS isn't helpful and can actually be counterproductive.  Also, you can't assume that the person is not aware of the problem and/or trying to do something about it.

Unless you are offering to pay for some sort of weight loss program, fitness counseling, fat camp - you probably are being more intrusive than anything else.[/quote]

But how is that different?  Is there a person on the planet who doesn't know that driving drunk isn't self-destructive behavior?  Or drug use?  Are you also suggesting that in those situations, offering concern for the individual would be "counterproductive" and "intrusive?"[/quote]

Drunk driving is dangerous, ILLEGAL behavior that could result in a tragedy for other blameless people...there's a substantial difference.  Life would be Hell for ALL of us if concerned relatives/friends continually "intervened" every time they thought we were making bad choices for ourselves.

[/quote]

Meaning - we ALL make bad choices for ourselves that often wind up effecting the quality of our lives and we may not appreciate other people rubbing our faces in our own bad choices.[/quote]

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