Reply to Financially Dependent Grandparent- wwyd

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[quote=Anonymous]My sweet, generous mother suffers from a serious anxiety disorder. In spite of therapy and medication, she is chronically unemployed, and in the words of DH, “a hard person to love.” At age 59, she has no job, no spouse, meager retirement savings and substantial credit card debt. She is living off a small inheritance from an aunt that is quickly running out. To make matters worse, she is not frugal. Her current living expenses, including therapy and meds, are about $65K a year.

Meanwhile, DH and I have two DC, ages 4 and 6 mos. We both work full time for a combined $220K. That may sound like a lot, but after mortgage, childcare, higher -than-average medical bills, and taxes, we have an “everything” savings of about $1,000 a month. To get more, we would have to make a significant change in our lives, such as having DH take a less family friendly job or moving to a cheaper house.

Having my mother move in with us would be bad, because her anxiety makes her a stressful person to be around. She is also unreliable and accident prone, so not a good childcare option. I’m not sure what to do. I don’t want to see my mother be homeless, but I also don’t want to tell DS that his college savings went to Grandma. Is anyone else in a similar situation? Thoughts and advice?
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