Reply to cant decide whether to go for the 'big' job or keep phoning it in

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Reply to "cant decide whether to go for the 'big' job or keep phoning it in - WWYD and why?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Same dilemma over here.  DH keeps telling me I'll be stressed and miserable if I take another job (and he's right).  But I'm also somewhat miserable being bored to tears at work and feeling like I'm not living up to my potential.  The only thing that makes my current job bearable is the hours and flexibility.  The trade-off is totally worth it now, but I'm afraid when the kids get older I'll regret having a mediocre career.  [/quote]

21:07 again ... I understand and identify with that.  One way to help defuse it may be to turn the perspective a bit.  On one level I feel that I "settled" and could have gone after more.  But I also know that for much of the past 7-12 years I was very distracted and getting ground down by the illness and then death of my father, and then my mother.  And I chose to spend time helping them and using that as an escape from some of the disenchantment with the job situation.  Since i had flexibility and understanding supervisors who knew that I would always make sure that everything was done and covered, whether I was in NJ or here on leave taking care of a parent, or teleworking, etc., I could do both.

And as burned out as I was/am (my mother died last December), just doing what I was brought up to believe was what you do (take care of your family), I heard from many people who had kind words over how much time I took to do that.

So my point is that in some way we have to redefine or reweigh how we measure our "career" - and while on one level I may've been frustrated and felt that I "settled", I also enabled myself to have a more complete life than I otherwise would have, and to take care of family when it was needed.  Not "career" per se, but something I try to let seep in and balance off the feelings of anger, frustration, resentment, etc., that I can have about the work situation per se.  I see that side.  Others see the side of my being able to be a senior manager in a national program for nearly 20 yrs. while also being able to take care of those other needs.  They're both "right."

But I digress ... Good luck and I'm sure you'll find a path that feels right to you.[/quote]

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