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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't think you can. Some kids have it even at age 7. Some kids may develop it later, but some never do.

I have one child who dabbles, happily and diligently but without real inner drive, and one who throws herself into her enthusiasm (which has lasted a couple of years now). I am sorry the first may never experience the rush of caring so much about something that you want to devote yourself to it 100 percent, even when the going gets tough, and she may never learn the self-discipline a passion can impose. She may also never get as good at anything as she would if she were passionate about it. But she is who she is. I am disappointed for her and frankly sometimes I feel a little disappointed in her, but I try to step very hard on that emotion.

She has tried and dropped several activities, which I don't make a fuss about, but I now expect her to stick to at least one thing she likes (in her case, piano) for several years so that she can experience the gains you get from commitment to something, anything. I also try to give her unstructured time so that any true interests she may develop are not squeezed out by her schedule. But she's entering middle school now, so that's getting harder.

In the end, I don't think I can change her. I can only give her the chance to be her own best self, cheesy as that sound.[/quote]

OMG, you are disappointed in your (10? 11? year-old?) because she will never get as good at anything if she were passionate enough, will never learn self-discipline?  Do you realize how nutty and sad this sounds?  She's a kid!  Already her mother is disappointed because she assumes she will never amount to anything.

Many of you have ridiculous assumptions about what kids should be doing and feeling.  They are not mini adults.  Push them to be now, and they will push back once they get older.  I have teens and I look around and see this dynamic over and over again.[/quote]

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