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[quote=Anonymous]In-laws visit regularly, and now that's it's summer, we host backyard bbq's.  I'm an aspiring home chef, and love spending my free time (hours upon hours, if available) preparing and making food for my family when I'm not working my tail off at my "real" job.  I have some basic rules, such as: fresher is better, always; stay away from processed, no matter how much you think no one can tell; etc. etc.  Anyway, I say this to illustrate where I am coming from--I can be anal and controlling about the final products that come out of my kitchen, even if it's just my (appreciative) husband and kids who are the audience.

FIL offers to do the grilling for the bbq's.  Not so much as a favor, but because I think he really enjoys it.  He can't grill where he lives because of the condo rules.  It's nice to see him in the backyard, checking on the meat with a drink in his hand.  But he wrecks the food.  36 hours of homemade bbq chicken prep, including homemade italian dressing, bbq seasoning and bbq sauce went out the window when the chicken was mostly charred on the outside and the meat was dry.  To be fair, I'm not saying it was throwaway, just a bad grilling job.  FIL thought it was delicious.

DCUM chorus, what would you do?  Since the bbq is for them when they come over, they are the only guests, is the gracious thing to let him overcook the meat?  Or confiscate his tongs, tell him he's an awful griller and grill it yourself?  This is DH's opinion, he later said he grew up with FIL's awful food and he found the chicken inedible.  He didn't eat much of it and he usually has a big appetite.  I think this is kind of mean.  It won't stop FIL from visiting, but I find it a very, very blunt approach.  Is there a more deft and tactful way of handling this?

I can tell you that if FIL continues to grill, there's no point is making homemade marinades, getting really good cuts of meat, or spending hours of prep on bbq--which I love doing!

Alternate is just to prepare foods when they come over that are not as participatory, such as baked dishes.  But I really do love a weekend bbq!!!!!  Do I have to give up bbq when they come over?

MIL is not an issue, she doesn't like to cook.

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