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Reply to "why do so many of you expect family to help"
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[quote=Anonymous]I would never expect anything. However, for YEARS, my mother has constantly urged me to give her grandchildren and has said over and over that she would help, provide daycare. The main reason I haven't had children up until now is because of the daycare issue (availability and expense and trust and the whole nine yards). Of course, she keeps telling me she will help, but then when I push her on it, she kind of back pedals. I have a suspicious that she's not the only mother to do this. And while I would never expect help and would never ask for it, it is completely unfair for a relative (knowing that you're hesitation in having children is the childcare issue) to promise to help and then back down from that when you need the help, especially if you would not have TTC if the offer of assistance was not made. Relatives and in laws have no right to make you feel guilty for not "giving" them grand children but then not want to help at all. They should just keep quiet and let you make the decisions that work best for you, even if that means not having children because you know you can't afford childcare and can't afford to have one spouse quit working.[/quote]
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