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[quote=Anonymous]WHY are you still in close contact??? 
It. is. not. worth. it. 
Your children will NOT miss grandparents such as these, and indeed you probably should not expose them to such misguided and violent persons.

Send a Christmas card, by all means, just so they have your address and phone number in case they need to contact you urgently - as in, one of them is on their deathbed.

But do not visit them. Do not invite them. Do not call them, unless maybe to wish them a happy birthday, but of course expect only abuse in return ("Too snobby now to call your own parent except once a year? Don't you dare wish me a happy birthday!").

And please go to therapy! You have been deeply hurt, and need to work through this with an experienced unbiased person.

As for your sisters, if they are sane and rational, you can perhaps meet with them if you do not talk about your parents. That way, your children can have a relationship with their aunties. Invite them to your house perhaps, so that they can see how well you function in your nuclear family and by contrast how twisted their childhood was.

As an adult, your real family can be comprised of very good friends, not necessarily blood relations. That is what DH and I have done, in part because our families live in Europe, and in part because my mother is similarly crazy.[/quote]

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