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[quote=Anonymous]Finally.  I never thought the day would come when DCUM would formally acknowledge the region's future so clearly.

In gratitude, one of our local builders in Tysons has agreed to modify some of its five-bedroom home models as follows:

- "The Crestwood":  one door to the outside will be lock-free, to make it easier for petty criminals to gain access to your belongings at all hours of the day and night

- "The Adams-Morgan":  extra water hook-ups will be added to this model's exterior, so that the owner can easily wash the puke off the driveway Sunday AM after all the DC residents have come to TyCo to party on Saturday night

- The "Bloomingdale":   the standard three-car garage will be eliminated and replaced by bike racks and extra storage space for skinny jeans, porkpie hats and Bon Iver remixes

- The "Capitol Hill":  this home will feature a flat lot and a level driveway, so that the ambulances can arrive and depart quickly when you've been assaulted in TyCo after midnight

- The "Lyon Village":  this home will feature a large deck with exterior Bose speakers, making it easier for residents to broadcast to everyone else in the area 24/7 how great they are.    [/quote]

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