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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Honestly it didn't work out well for me. My mom had me at 42 and now in my mid 30s I have toddlers and a parent who has failing health. She was always in great shape but got cancer st the age of 74 and has gone down hill quickly. It would be much easier if my kids were in grade school while this was going on. I am also an only so everything is my sole responsibility. My dad was 44 when I was born, marathon runner, successful executive, always active ect ect but died from a heart attack at 75. He has older children from a first marriage who have kind of vanished from my moms life slowly but surely. Everything was peachy till I hit my thirties when one parent died and one became very ill,  now I have a baby and two toddlers who are often times dragged to chemo appointments, know the home health aid by name and are often late to preschool because I just don't have my shit together. I love my mom and my kids and it's really really tough.[/quote]
 
PP, I'm so sorry to hear that you are going through this.  It is hard to care for young children and a sick parent, but you'll be glad you were there for your mom. To me, it sounds like you very much have your shit together and your priorities in place.  I hope you are able to find some support through this difficult time.  I lost my father years before losing my mother to cancer (while I had young children). I remember trying to be a good mother and daughter at the same time.  It was so tough, but I told myself that I was being good to my children by allowing them to see me caring for my mother. I hoped that they would learn compassion from the experience and they did.

But, both my parents had me young, so it goes to show that you can't necessarily lay out plans that will ensure you are healthy through your children's child-bearing years.  While I understand that you think it didn't work out well for you, it sounds like you had great parents and that you are a good parent and daughter yourself, so in that way it turned out well.  Be good to yourself.[/quote]

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