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[quote=Anonymous]DH and I do not invite anyone to stay with us during the school year, unless it is a long break like the winter holidays, or spring break. We have too much going on with work, school, kid activities during the non-holiday school year to be good hosts. We freely invite people during school breaks and over the summer, and we are very good hosts who spend lots of quality time with our guests. We cook, clean, plan activities, and cater to our guests in every way, WHEN we are up for hosting them.

DH’s parents wanted to come visit from this Thursday-Monday in order to attend a wedding that *our family was not invited to and has no connection with* about 20 minutes from our house. ILs live about a 2-hour drive from our house, a 2.5-hour drive from the event venue. They are well-off and easily could have afforded a hotel, especially given there was a hotel room block for this wedding.

We said yes, but DH made it crystal clear that they are welcome to stay, but we aren’t up for “hosting-hosting” during a busy time; our kids are still in school until the middle of next week. We have a busy weekend this weekend, as usual. Our activities a DD sleepover Saturday-to-Sunday that we made sure to tell DH’s parents about, to set expectations. We also have a birthday party for the other DD, Sunday. “Oh yes, that’s fine, we understand. We know you’re busy, we just need a place to sleep, we just wanted to see you a little bit but we’ll mostly be busy with wedding stuff.”

Well, I bet you can see where this is going! Whining: no one was here to greet us Thursday afternoon (they know the garage code). Uh, yeah, as discussed. We’re having lasagna leftovers for dinner?! Yes, we’re not doing a ton of extra cooking, as discussed. Wait, you’re both going to work on Friday?! Yes, as freaking discussed. We’re ordering pizza for dinner?

They went to the wedding yesterday. Now, on Sunday, “Can’t Larla skip the birthday party and spend time with us?” No, she RSVPd and she wants to go. “What do you mean, Janie wants to take a nap after lunch—Janie you shouldn’t go to sleepovers if you’re going to be so tired.” I am over it with their complaints! I am hiding from them because I am so irritated, I don’t want to shout at them to knock it off, we told them this was a busy time. DH is over it and is thinking about asking them to leave this afternoon instead of tomorrow morning. We’re both absolutely over them—we clearly communicated this is not a hosting-hosting visit. [/quote]

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