Reply to When other kids are unkind to your kid, how do you keep emotional distance from it?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is really eye-opening to me- so many grudge holders.  I just don't operate that way.

Maybe it's partly from being a teacher, and seeing how much kids change from year to year, but I think you all are being hugely unfair.

I would never encourage a friendship with someone who is being awful, but I also think kids change.[/quote]

Not even a teacher but a parent of 3 very different kids and a frequent volunteer in elementary- kids change SO MUCH from year to year. One of my kids was a mess in second grade- argumentative, disregulated, not pleasant to be around- and now, in 5th, he is described by his teachers as universally well liked and funny and kind. And I witness it too! And some girls are total Bs in the early grades and then are the most inclusive ones later on. Interestingly, some of the girls who struggled more socially in the early grades become the most nasty by 5th- as if their parents taught them “well screw anyone who isn’t nice to you!” During those hard early years and now they have become an 11 year old who is very quick to say “screw you!!” to any perceived slight from a kid who doesn’t mean any harm. It’s interesting to see the changes.

Holding grudges against a 7 year old
Who is gonna be a totally different person as a 9 year old is silly [/quote]

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