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[quote=Anonymous]For me, having an au pair was like having another child... in addition to the three I was trying to manage.

Mistakes I made:

1) Not holding out for someone who was older and more experienced.  My au pair had never lived away from home and was immature.  Other people are "pickier" with who they choose and have better luck getting someone qualified.

2) I knew in the first week that it was a bad fit and the coordinator person made it about me being intolerant and I backed down.  She ended up leaving 6 months into the year because it just wasn't a fit.

3) Do you have a dedicated space in your house where she can live?  We had ours in a finished basement and she was sulky about it not being as nice as other people's situations.  If I were to do it again, I would make sure I had a guest room en suite to give her her own space.

4) Are you willing to shower your au pair with extra money so she will like you and feel good about being with your family?  I didn't realize this was a thing and would get annoyed when she would ask me to pay for things that I figured she should use her stipend for.

I ended up with a housekeeper/family helper and that was a much better fit for me.  I realized I don't like non-family members in my home around the clock.

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