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[quote=Anonymous]He almost certainly has ADHD (forgetting to do things like pay bills, poor sleep regulation, lack of follow through) and this is why he self- medicated with drugs and alcohol. Untreated ADHD leads to anxiety, depression and self-loathing, since these people know they’re not functioning appropriately yet cannot do better even when they try. My 9 year old son called himself stupid and became very sad before he was diagnosed with severe inattentive ADHD and anxiety (and later, with autism).

There are several types of ADHD: hyperactive, inattentive or mixed. The inattentive ones often fail to be recognized.

I would offer to pay for a psychiatric evaluation, to explore ADHD and possibly other disorders. ADHD meds can work miraculously well, and with an executive functioning coach and meds he might be able to get a useful degree and find more stable work. The coach is necessary so he learns how to schedule and plan his life. Meds will give him focus.

Also he should take a home sleep apnea test. My son also had mild sleep apnea which made everything worse.

Your brother is 30. Life’s not over. 
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