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[quote=Anonymous]My friend recently asked me to be a witness on her beneficiary designation on her 401k account. 
She has 3 kids, 2 with special needs (autism, severe mental health issues, the kids are currently teens and their futures are far from settled) and about 2 mil net worth with half in 401 and half in their home and other assets. 
My friend listed her current boyfriend as the sole beneficiary of the 401 because she “loves” him and he has no money of his own after job loss and divorce. 
I feel really really uneasy about this. I am also divorced and repartnered but my partner would never want this. If I die, it all goes to my kids (via a trust) who will need it to pay for college and help them in their lives. My ex husband has made similar arrangements.

I think it is a really bad idea for my friend to leave half her money to this boyfriend. But she says she loves him and feels sorry for him because “he’s had bad luck and his ex wife took everything”. I am certain there is more to this story. My friend has low self esteem and cannot even go a day without a boyfriend. Since her divorce, she has literally not had one single day where she was not in a relationship or desperately seeking one. Her current guy seems decent, like I don’t think he will murder her, but I don’t understand how someone educated with a good job and savings would want to be in a relationship with a broke 50 year old.

I also think she is underestimating what her kids are going to need as adults. If I were a kid in this situation I would feel very hurt. 
I delayed signing the witness form because I felt uneasy about it. Finally my friend reminded me and I relented, after all, it’s a free country. But I don’t feel right about this at all. 
What does DCUM think?[/quote]

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