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[quote=Anonymous]I invited my husband’s aunt from out of state for a small, half-day family function and told her there was absolutely no pressure to attend. She booked a flight, then asked to stay with us for 6 days and for me to pick her up and drop her off at the airport. She’s really the only living relative on my husband’s side who shows much interest in our son.

Since my husband’s dad passed away, there has been a lot of family tension, especially around getting his mom into care. His sister got heavily involved and did not want their mom to move out of her house. My MIL ended up moving into four different assisted living facilities in one year, and got kicked out because of her high needs and behaviors - and now she’s living with SIL. Because of all of that, my husband rarely sees his sister or mom outside of holidays and birthdays.

I’m just overwhelmed with hosting at this point. DH’s aunt stays up until 2 AM with all the lights on and the TV blasting, then sleeps until noon. She insists on cooking even after I’ve told her she doesn’t need to, but she makes things we realistically won’t eat — like tuna salad with wasabi or potato salad with raisins. She’s also not particularly careful about handwashing and will lick her fingers while cooking or mix food with her hands, which honestly grosses me out. I hosted all of DH’s family on Saturday, and honestly I am completely exhausted from dealing with his aunties and mom. His aunt constantly complains that it’s too cold, that the water pressure isn’t strong enough, and she’s started wearing my husband’s bathrobe around the house like she lives here. She also keeps trying to tickle our 7-year-old even after he has clearly told her to STOP.

She seems mostly interested in cooking food, taking it to her friends, and driving my car around, which honestly terrifies me because she can barely get in and out of the vehicle safely. I’m trying to be gracious because she’s family and because she’s one of the few relatives who shows interest in our son, but I’m completely overwhelmed and my patience is running out.

What’s also odd is that her son lives only 20 minutes away, but she doesn’t seem interested in staying with him, and it doesn’t sound like she’s been invited to either. She and my MIL also have this bizarre dynamic where they constantly make snide comments about each other behind their backs.

She already extended the trip longer than expected to see friends and family, and now she realized she accidentally booked her return flight for the wrong day and wants to stay two more days. I genuinely cannot do it. I’m about to lose my mind. I feel like I’m constantly cleaning dishes, tidying up, and managing the house, while she makes comments about how my husband doesn’t do enough.

I also had no PTO left to spend extra time with her, so I’ve been working from home during part of the visit. Even then, she’s constantly in my space — knocking on my bedroom door while I’m showering, interrupting work to ask for random kitchen items, etc.

I need to tell her I can’t host her past tomorrow, which was the original departure date, but I don’t want to come across as rude.[/quote]

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