Reply to BTDT Parents: please recommend college app to-dos and timeline for a first-time app parent

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We're rookies at this.

Have met with college counselor at our school. Have toured colleges. So far everything has been very pleasant, fun even. These are what we have done so far:
- Met with college counselor; agreed with rough college list. We are happy with CC's recommendations and DC is very excited
- DC (separately from us) met with CC to discuss which teachers to approach for rec letters
- DC worked on activity and award list, which has been submitted to CC
- DC took the SAT and got a great score the 2nd time so that is done
- Summer job and senior year course load all finalized

So far, no drama. Since we came back from campus tours, I have been asking DC to start looking at prompt questions and what each college asks for. We also asked DC to contact graduates from our high school who attend these colleges (this was CC's suggestion). DC now suddenly seems uninterested in college apps, so DH and I find ourselves nagging a bit because we don't know what we're supposed to do from this point on to keep making progress. DC has done nothing since coming home from campus tours.

Is this too early to nag? Is there a cadence or timeline BTDT parents can recommend, e.g., meet every sunday to work on college essays or is that too frequent? What else do we as parents do now other than plan how to pay for college? Are there keys steps I am missing between now and Nov 1? Should we go back to tour shortlist of ED schools again?

DC is making good grades and working hard at ECs. We don't have a consultant. DH and I don't know what we're supposed to do. [/quote]

You are far ahead. Don't worry about the rest during the school year.

- May/June: Ask DC to think about small moments (and capture in notes app) for the main common app essay. Just brainstorming might take weeks....no stress.
- Do a writing workshop in June or July for the main Common App essay. Try to finalize by Aug 1. Ask for suggestions on here or better in FB groups.
- 1x a week have DC do "research" on a school (input into a Google Doc) for the supplemental essays: research classes, professors, activities, traditions, anything of interest. Organize in one place.
- Begin working on supplemental essays in July/August. 
- Try to get one rolling application in by Aug 15 (Pitt?) so the kid feels good.
- Make a timeline for fall and master Google Doc with deadlines (August).

[/quote]

+1. This is spot on. I'd add that it can be helpful to have a weekly "college stuff" meetup scheduled with your DC once summer starts to stay calibrated, make sure they have their "to-do" list for the week, etc. If they're on track doing more on their own (e.g. drafting the common app essay, etc), great. If they're not making progress with what they planned to tackle for the week, just be curious and see if they need more support - like work with an essay tutor for a few sessions, writing camp, parallel work time with parent at  coffee shop, etc. Then, during the rest of the week when you have thoughts or questions and urges to nag, just stick those on your "weekend meeting topics" list on your phone and leave your DC alone. This help keep the relationship from being all about college, and over time your DC or the universe may have solved/handled some of those items before the next check-in time rolls around. [/quote]

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