Reply to Struggling to balance old friendships with people who have different lifestyles

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How do you handle?

Ex, I have a few old friends who have very little family. One is an only child, not close with extended family, and she works only part time (very PT). She is now married, but no kids. She is close with one of her parents but doesn’t see her often.

I work FT at a demanding job, am primary breadwinner of my family of 4, and have extended family in and out. I’m just busy pretty much every single day with some obligation or another (usually many of them) and so so tired much of the time.

I feel bad that I don’t call her back right away, she invites me on vacations but I don’t have time to go on them, etc.

She seems understanding at times, but I’m sure she notices.

She’s a wonderful person and I don’t want to lose her as a friend. [/quote]

Well, for starters, you could work on how much contempt you have for this friend. Just because you chose to have kids and a full-time job and spend time with your extended family doesn't make you a better person than she is. And if you want to protest that you don't think that, you do, it's clear from your post.

Your "feeling bad" that you don't call them back or travel with them is coming across as fake pity and it's gross. What exactly do you think your friend notices? That you think your life is more important and fulfilling than hers? I'm sure she does notice, since I noticed.[/quote]

I agree with this.[/quote]

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