Reply to How do I get over guilt and second-guessing myself about moving mom to memory care

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[quote=Anonymous]My mom adjusted, and at a certain point it was clear that she felt much safer there than anywhere else. I still remember bringing her back after a long day at the ER and she was so happy to see her caregivers there. I could see her relax. That being said, she also had times when she hated it and wanted to leave and didn't understand why she was there. She also didn't know why we werent all living together--her, my dad (who she divorced in 1994!), and my brother.   THis is the nature of the cruel disease--what they feel and think really does not have bearing on their reality, so you have to make the decisions for them.

I also think that the memory care physician tried a few different mood medications before finding the right one that helped her anxiety without drugging her out. You may wish to inquire.

As long as she is getting good care, you are doing the best you can. If assisted living said she was ready, then she was ready and safer there than anywhere else. [/quote]

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