Reply to Making new friends when you're DINKS in the burbs

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm the jobs pp.

Thinking of myself and every other then-childless person I knew in DC at the time ... We all made lite friends through work. Most were situational but a handful will be enduring thru moves, kids, even divorce.

You're doing all the right things so far but it seems clear that your office(s?) are the problem.  And the complete lack of social feel whatsoever leads me to think it could be your profession, possibly?  Are you at Lockheed or in an accounting firm?  If'so, you may be stuck.

Otherwise it's time to invite 4 people over for a drunken BBQ. I'm serious. Identify the best prospects for fun, stock up on wine and just do it.

This can work -- I actually managed to shake up a staid legal publishing office once by injecting social opportunities into the routine.

[/quote]

I love my job and don't want to change jobs.  It's great except that I have no friends outside the office (but am very friendly at the office and am always called a team player by my boss).  I have thought about becoming the "social director" of my office, and scheduling a few happy hours or something, but I honestly don't think it would be welcomed, and I don't want to face more rejection.  Since moving here I have put myself out there so many times, taken the initiative, but people don't seem interested or they talk about how crazy busy they are with friends and family, and I have been rejected over and over.  You always hear about this area being so transient but I have not foundt hat to be the case at all--everyone we meet is either from here, or their spouse if from here, or they have lived here for 10 year or more and have tons of social connections.  We are the only ones who have no family here and no friends.  That is pretty unusual from what I've observed.

Anyhow, it is very, very hard to build a social network when you are new to the area.  I don't really think the burbs has much to do with it, but I think maybe being childless makes it harder.  We are getting ready to TTC, but I also feel sad because I would have no one to invite to see the baby, no one to give me a baby shower, no friends or family to help out during the pregnancy or after the baby is born.  We have moved a few times since we moved to this area, and we had no one to help us move, no one to invite to a housewarming.  It makes me feel really isolated, and I often wonder if moving here was a mistake.  Though honestly I don't think it would be much better anywhere else.[/quote]

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