Reply to Making new friends when you're DINKS in the burbs

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Many (most?) childless people in this area pick up lite friends through the shared interest of their job.

What profession are you and your husband in that every single other coworker is 62 but you are 32?
[/quote]

Well, not all our co-workers are in their 50s and 60s but most are.  The rest live in the city so it would be very difficult to get together.  [b]Also, none of our co-workers have expressed any interest in getting together outside of work.[/b]  This puzzles me, because when we lived in other cities, our co-workers were much more social and interested in getting together outside of work.  Neither of our workplaces have any happy hours, get togethers, holiday parties, etc.  Both of us have let our co-workers know that we are new to the area and don't have any ties here, but no one has suggested getting together.  Our workplaces seem to have an unspoken "co-workers are not your friends" rule.[/quote]

Have you asked?  [/quote]

No, I haven't asked.  One co-worker, who I work closely with and who is around my age said very soon after I started the job there that she was not looking to make any new friends.  I think she said that because she thought I might ask her to get together sometime.  The message was clear.  Other co-workers are always talking about how crazy busy their weekends are, packed with friends and family.  They clearly have plenty of social connections and aren't looking for more.  I also don't want my co-workers to know how lonely I am.  There also seems to be an unspoken rule in my office about not being friends outside the office--although we all get along great at work, I have never heard of anyone hanging out after work.  I just get that feeling and don't want to initiative a get together when others don't seem receptive.  That will put them in an awkward position saying no, and then things will be awkward at the office, which I don't want.

As for DH's office, his office is mostly older married men in their 50s and 60s, so he hasn't really made much of an effort.  [/quote]

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