Reply to Need advice: How to want or get more for myself?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]making a "wishlist'- make it as out there as you want I'd say. then look at it again and think about what is feasible for you and then research the steps to get there.

I'd also advise you to strengthen your "joy" and want muscles- go to the National gallery and explore art that makes you feel good, listen to music that make you feel good- take walks outside and visit places in your area that are beautiful.  Read comforting books, watch comforting shows.

its getting warmer- go to a bougie neighborhood & walk into a made well or a j crew or universal stander or whatever random nice shop in a nice neighborhood and force yourself to buy something , made of natural materials like cotton or linen or silk- that you like that makes you feel happy when you wear it and then wear it.

just go to bougie boutique neighborhoods and browse- dont buy anything, just enjoy the goods and ambiance.  it will develop your taste.

go to the farmers market and just enjoy the atmosphere

I really recommend immersing yourself in art and nature b/c beauty is healing. 
 
go and get some nice - 100% linen or cotton-bedsheets and new supportive pillows and a lovely quilt that you can warp around yourself when you sleep.

buy yourself a 100 % cotton pajamas, throw away clothes & shoes that pinch or poke or scratch.

go to the library- check out a book, or download an audiobook for free from libby and go to one of the lovely free spaces in your area- like the conservatory, the National portrait gallery atrium - and just spend time there, enjoying the book/story.

do you cook or bake?  pick up a cook book (library again!) that you love and teach yourself all the recipes you like and only eat meals that actually make your mouth water, that taste good- not food that just fills your stomach

put on classical music or jazz (basically instrumental "high art music) while you are doing boring things like cleaning, laundry, cooking.

buy an olive oil soap that smells good.

always moisturize before sleep, and check your hands, if they feel dry- moisturize!

get flowers or plant something, nurture it, help it to grow.  maybe something that smells good like jasmine.

[/quote]

Wow, I love this list.

Not op but with similar problems figuring out what I want because of a tendency to put others' desires first. I recently had a free day all to myself that I wasted half of because it was so hard to figure out what I wanted when there was no one else to placate or compromise with.[/quote]

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