Reply to AITA Asking family to accommodate

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[quote=Anonymous]I am probably in the wrong but I’m at a loss.  I’ve posted before.

DD has major SN. Autism plus a list of other things including physical disabilities that make normal kid things hard. We are doing Everything possible and one of those things are knowing when to push, accommodate, or decline.

Extended family including grandparents don’t get it. We ask for small accommodations like 1-on-1 or small group quiet activities so that we can see them. But, no - everything is on their terms to meet them in a place, activity, or party that will guarantee meltdown and set backs.

So, they stopped.DD hasn’t seen her aunt and uncle in 5 years. She can’t identify them in a picture. They won’t call or anything like that. Grandparents are aging which I get, and we used to visit them but they won’t respect kids boundaries like not touching without warning, getting in her face, or insisting that she act in a neurotypical way. (Eye contact  and handshakes are the least of my concerns right now.)

So,I’m pissed. There are big family events coming up. Adults will divide and conquer. But I asked for minor accommodations so that DD can see certain important family members in a lower stress environment between festivities and were met with No.

I’m the AH for being upset and asking for accommodations? I feel abandoned. [/quote]

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