Reply to Telling people with dementia that dead people will visit them

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom told my demented father that his mother was dead when he was anxious and looking for her. She died over 50 years ago. She had to watch him re-experience his mother’s death all over again. This isn’t any better. Sometimes there is no good option.[/quote]
They haven’t tried other options. Staff is giving a very specific therapeutic lie and it isn’t working. As others have suggested, something that is more vague should be tried. It’s a red flag that staff didn’t figure this out immediately and try it. [/quote]

Yes, I do not agree that I am "micromanaging" as others have said.

Because of the upset nature of the patient, the nurses were testing the living parent for a UTI and want to change medications and add a visit to a psychiatrist. However, the staff themselves is at least partly causing this problem by telling my parent that their dead spouse will show up.

Yes, I know that dementia is the main problem. I get it. But [b]why add more confusion to a confused person's day?[/b]

I suggested they ask the staff to say one of the adult kids will show up because we are ALIVE and DO show up. But a dead person can't show up at all. Ever.

Before this the living parent never asked about the dead parent...But with the staff reminding them they "have" a spouse, the living parent was getting all upset. What is the point beyond getting the patient upset?

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