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[quote=Anonymous] I feel like my son (19 y.o.) is messing up his life but afraid to interfere too much not to lose connection with him. He is a sophomore  in college, used to live in the dorms, but after a failed semester lost his scholarship and moved in with us. Although his grades went up, he hated living with at home and asked to rent him an apartment in the city. We refused (just don't have the money). He then found a job that pays well but not enough to pay the for the apartment. The job is interesting and in his field, but we cautioned him that it's impossible to combine 30 hrs a week with being a full time student. He admitted contemplating dropping out of college. Finally, he moved in with his girlfriend that he met in August (so he knows her for less than 6 months). She is a bit older and will be graduating this year.  DH and I are not psyched about her for a number of reasons but keep our mouths shut. He also has several fake IDs and drinks regularly. We confiscated IDs, he'd get new ones. Now when he's not living with us, we are not sure how much he drinks and since the girl is smoking he picked up smoking too. He gets very pissy, screams, slams doors or just leaves when we are trying to approach the situation. We have no control over the situation anymore and scared that he'll drop out of college and we'll become a drunk (family history here). What would you do?[/quote]

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