Reply to The advice to call out one-uppers or competitive 'friends'

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Reply to "The advice to call out one-uppers or competitive 'friends'"

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[quote=Anonymous]For purposes of this conversation, a one-upper is someone who always seems to want to 'top' everything you say. So like if you tell a friend your kid got a cold at daycare and the cough has really been lingering, she will one-up you by saying 'oh my nanny ensures my child never gets that kind of illness.' The one-upping isn't always just to be superior, sometimes it can be for attention or sympathy. Like if you are with a group of friends and describing a difficult situation at work, a one-upper might jump in with 'oh I'm dealing with that too, only it's worse because...'

When this behavior comes up on DCUM, I often see the advice to call it out, every time, until they stop.

Has anyone ever actually done this, and did it work? I am curious because the one time I had a friend like this in my life, I attempted to call it out and she started flipping it around on me and saying I was too sensitive or was misinterpreting her comments. It turned into an argument. Eventually I just quit being friends with her. But calling it out had no impact and I think just made her defensive.

So I'm just interested to hear if anyone has ever done this successfully. I find this behavior really obnoxious and actually wish there was a good way to get someone to become self aware about it and stop but in my experience, there is not.[/quote]

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