Reply to Remarried -- how best to structure my will/trust for my adult children.

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm meeting with a lawyer to revise my will and trust tomorrow after getting remarried last month. I'm trying to figure out how to articulate what to ask for and what questions I might need to ask.

Circumstances are these: I'm 54. My new wife is 50. We are both in good health. My children are 23 and 21. Everyone gets along fine.

I bring more assets into the marriage than her -- I owned my home, I have more in retirement accounts. Moreover, I believe my ex-wife is entitled to some portion of my pension (I forget what the QDRO says, but we've been divorced for about seven years, so what I've accrued since then is my own). New wife has her own pension which will be more generous than mine despite my higher salary (she's a public school teacher and will have 30 years in when she retires).

There is a very simple prenup that basically says our retirement accounts are our own and there would be no alimony in the event of divorce. It also walls off a certain amount of home equity that was accrued before she moved in. I intend to put her on title and put in prenup that she gets 50% of future home appreciation as of her move-in date (which was a couple of years before the wedding) as she contributes to the mortgage.

I've already decided to name her as the decision maker on my AMD. I'm comfortable with that. The kids would be second in line.

From a money perspective, my goals are simple: I want to be sure she is provided for in the event of me preceding her in death while also preserving assets for my children. At the same time, I want her to have the right to live in the home we share as long as she wants without the kids forcing her to sell to liquidate the house (should she decide that's what she wants). But I don't want all my assets to transfer to her in their entirety because 1) I want my kids to get something; and 2) I want to protect them should she need nursing care down the line, etc.
 
Can the trust be set up to hold my assets for my children but pay her an income from it in the event of my death? I have my best friend named as trustee. Can I put her on title of the house if the house is currently in trust?

There could also be future inheritances from my own parents and hers. I assume for legal purposes we'll keep those separate.

Thanks for any insights or suggestions about what I should be asking. [/quote]

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