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[quote=Anonymous]My then 13 yo dd was left by a friend, it caused a huge rift (one that my dd wants to repair) because the friend pointed out a conversational issue that I think is too advanced/too much to expect.

It has been a while, and the friendship rift keeps coming back like a bad coin. To me, it’s very sad. My dd feels the same. In groups, they are managing ok but the friend has my dd blocked on the phone. Group texts are strange …

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It is advanced / near-adult-level  to do this in conversation:

Friend 1 “I have a huge problem. My xy teacher is making me do yz. My coach said I can’t do that because of x practice issue. I don’t have time for school, sports, my friends and family.”

Friend 2 “That sounds so hard. I’m here for you, just a listening ear. So sorry.”

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Instead my dd, at age 13, tried to talk her best friend through the problem. My goodness, it took most of us to 18-25 to learn about this. In fact, it wasn’t even in the public sphere as a notion until the 2000s. When it was pointed out to my dd (again, just trying to help her friend), dd tried to correct it and get the concept but it’s not like she’s going to transform right away.

Further issues appeared, also just nonsensical. And though I like and miss this friend, she’s not being very open to repair, holding grudges, and I guess I don’t want my dd to navigate this anymore.[/quote]

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