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[quote=Anonymous]So many things! My career is essentially a failure -- I have a job but the money I spent on a graduate degree and my early ambitions were totally for nothing. When I talk to friends from grad school and right after about work, I can see the bewilderment that I am where I am. But I just flamed out -- I wasn't good enough, didn't have the energy, and couldn't cut it. I feel fortunate to have a steady paycheck doing work that isn't physically taxing. I'm rounding on 50 and have to accept it's as far as I'm ever going to get in this career.

I have some ambition to maybe start a small business or pursue a second career in a less competitive field once my kid's college is taken care of and I can take that kind of risk.

I also had a huge social failure about 10 years ago I'm still recovering from. Not romantic -- I had a falling out with a friend and almost everyone in our mutual friend group took her side. It was really brutal -- a ton of rejection all at once. In the midst of my career sputtering out, it was a really tough time. I got depressed, when to therapy, and really struggled for several years.

To be honest, this stuff still stings a little bit. But I have a nice life now. My job is small but it has its satisfactions (and perks -- the one thing about having a job that is no big deal is that it leaves you with a lot of bandwidth to pursue other passions, including parenting). I have a good group of friends and I also learned I'm more resilient than I thought, and also that even if other people don't like me, I can still love myself.

I find the Mary Oliver poem Wild Geese to be encouraging. Good luck, OP![/quote]

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