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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP. I was in your shoes. I had a friend who had cancer (stage 1). who lived on the West Coast while I am in the East Coast. She had a mastectomy and chemo and didn't want any visitors so I never went but I was always supportive over the phone. I had health issues later but I she never bothered to call and check on me. I was always the one who was initiating and every time she would say she had to do something and cut the call after a few minutes. At one point I told her to call me when she is free and she called me after almost a year. By that point I was done with the relationship too. It just meant she moved on and I had to do the same.  Now I consider her more a person whom I would call out of the blue if I wanted to. I stopped investing in this friendship. I used to call her once a year and she never reached out ever so I stopped that too. It was a sad end to a 25 year friendship where we used to call every week.[/quote]

Yes, our situation is pretty similar. And that's how I felt, down to the calling and feeling like I bothered her for calling, being the one to initiate. It does make me feel sad because it was a meaningful, important friendship for both of us for decades, and I've gotten to that point of feeling like maybe all efforts, even tiny ones, are just not appropriate bc if she still wanted to hear from me she'd reach out.[/quote]

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