Reply to Any shared insights / lessons learned on designing best-for-kids custody situations

Forum Index » Parenting -- Special Concerns

Reply to "Any shared insights / lessons learned on designing best-for-kids custody situations "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]are the kids resisting being at the fathers?

Kids’ ages? Genders?

Is he the 30/20?

I think there is more to what you are saying. If both parents are on board with the arrangement then it’s really simple to file a mutually-agreed upon parenting plan with specifics or even one without any specifics depending on your jurisdiction. [b]I’m guessing you actually have worries about your DH’s ability to commit to a real plan and questions about your kids’ resistance to being with him.[/b] I wouldn’t suggest a full parenting evaluation or whatever it’s called in your state, but what’s really going on here? Is your DH pushing for more time than he can reasonably commit to and your kids don’t want to be with him, [b]and DH expects you to flex around his schedule? If so, I’m currently in that situation and a casual understanding is just not going to cut it.[/b] “Cooperative” and “coparenting” are not compatible with a parent who has an inflexible and unpredictable schedule and is typically just marketing language from that person or their attorney to get a more favorable outcome.

Sorry to sound paranoid but you’re raising a lot of red flags here.[/quote]

Thank you. This is exactly the type of gut check I am looking for. Yes, he's the 30/20. The children are the same gender (first and third grade).

I'm second guessing myself agreeing to 70-80 percent - even though I want to be with my children as much as possible - if it's letting him off the hook for parenting in some way. And if it's better for them to spend more time with their father, and/or I will regret as we get further into this and it's constantly me flexing to accommodate him.

It's hard to tell if my kids truly don't want to be with him, or it's just something they say when they don't get their way, or they are feeling anxious about transitioning between two homes. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics